Thursday, January 12, 2012

We've Got Trouble Right Here in the Democratic Party!



Well, either you're closing your eyes To a situation you do now wish to acknowledge Or you are not aware of the caliber of disaster indicated By the presence of a Obamanite in your community. 
 
Ya got trouble, my friend, right here, I say, trouble right here in the Democrat Party
 
Why sure I'm a word player, Certainly mighty proud I say I'm always mighty proud to say it.  I consider that the hours I spend With a word on my tongue are golden. Help you cultivate horse sense And a cool head and a keen eye. Never take and try to give An iron-clad leave to yourself From a three-syllable verbal shot? 
 
But just as I say, It takes judgement, brains, and maturity to score In a wordsmith game, I say that any beaker kin take And shove a word in an ear socket. And they call that truth
 
The first big step on the road To the depths of deg-ra-Day-- I say, first, medicinal wine from a teaspoon, Then beer from a bottle. An' the next thing ya know, Your son is writin' for money In a pinch-back suit. And list'nin to some big out-a-town Jasper Hearin' him tell about horse-race gamblin'. Not a wholesome trottin' race, no! But a race where they set down right on the horse! Like to see some stuck-up jockey'boy Sittin' on Dan Patch? Make your blood boil? 
 
Well, I should say. Friends, lemme tell you what I mean. Ya got one, two, three, four, five, six vowels in a composition table. Words that mark the diff'rence Between a gentlemen and a bum, With a capital "B," And that rhymes with "P" and that stands for Obama
 
And all week long at your Democrat Party Youth'll be frittern away, I say your young men'll be frittern! Frittern away their noontime, suppertime, choretime too! Get the word in the docket, Never mind gittin' Dandelions pulled Or the screen door patched or the beefsteak pounded. Never mind pumpin' any water 'Til your parents are caught with the Cistern empty On a Saturday night and that's trouble, 
 
Oh, yes we got lots and lots a' trouble. I'm thinkin' of the kids in the knickerbockers, Shirt-tail young ones, peekin' at the Obama Campaign window after school, look, folks! Right here in River City. Trouble with a capital "T" And that rhymes with "P" and that stands for OBAMAL
 
Now, I know all you folks are the right kinda parents. I'm gonna be perfectly frank. Would ya like to know what kinda conversation goes On while they're loafin' around the Obama Campaign? They're tryin' out Bevo, tryin' out cubebs, Tryin' out Tailor Mades like Cigarette Feends! And braggin' all about How they're gonna cover up a tell-tale breath with Sen-Sen. 
 
One fine night, they leave the Obama campaign, Headin' for the dance at the Arm'ry! Libertine men and Scarlet women! And Rag-time, shameless music That'll grab your son and your daughter With the arms of a jungle animal instink! Mass-staria! Friends, the idle brain is the devil's playground! 
 
Trouble, oh we got trouble, Right here in River City! With a capital "T" That rhymes with "P" And that stands for OBAMA, That stands for OBAMA
 
We've surely got trouble! Right here in River City, Right here! Gotta figger out a way To keep the young ones moral after school! Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble... 
 
Mothers of River City! Heed the warning before it's too late! Watch for the tell-tale sign of corruption! The moment your son leaves the house, Does he rebuckle his knickerbockers below the knee? Is there a nicotine stain on his index finger? A dime novel hidden in the corn crib? Is he starting to memorize jokes from Capt. Billy's Whiz Bang? 
 
Are certain words creeping into his conversation? Words like 'swell?" And 'so's your old man?" 
 
Well, if so my friends, Ya got trouble, Right here in River city! With a capital "T" And that rhymes with "P" And that stands for OBAMA
 
We've surely got trouble! Right here in River City! Remember the Maine, Plymouth Rock and the Golden Rule! Oh, we've got trouble. We're in terrible, terrible trouble. That book with the twentysix alphabetized letters is a devil's tool! 
 
Oh yes we got trouble, trouble, trouble! With a "T"! Gotta rhyme it with "P"! And that stands for OBAMA!!!

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